Tuesday, October 29, 2013

☆☆ Starry Night ☆☆

As I was lying on the soft, silky sand my mind began pacing through thoughts of being. I began dwelling on those typical life questions about life and God and existence.

“A rhizome has no beginning or end; it is always in the middle, between things, interbeing, intermezzo.”
           - Deleuze and Guattari (A Thousand Plateaus: “Introduction: Rhizome”

Well, God has no beginning or end…would that make Him a rhizome? Structurally, I suppose it could be seen that way, but factually (in my spirit) I know He is beyond a rhizome. In Genesis 1:1 it says that “God created the heavens and the earth.” And thus, He created the rhizome.
Going along with Deleuze and Guattari, I must then be a tree, from Georgia, one that has a “segmented higher unity.”

God is my rhizome. He is forever and I am impermanent.

As I pondered this, I began envisaging my imminent demise…it was bound to happen, so why ignore it? I suppose the idea that impermanence and mystery of the stepin front of the one we just took keeps us in constant flux. And this mystery called life definitely kept me wandering in wonder.


I exhaled one of those exhausting and understandable ssssssssighs of polite resignation to that fact that there was no way I could ever answer these questions. I gave them to God and closed my eyes to a starry slumber.


Tuesday, October 15, 2013

♩ ♪ ♫ A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes ♫ ♪ ♩





Looking out from Miami Beach, the ocean was so ominous and peaceful. It beckoned me; it was as if the ocean had transcended its concrete role. It was no longer this giant body of ~water~ it had become my Wonderland. I was swimming with mermaids, talking with fish, making real castles from the sand. My imagination had no limitations; I could just be and do whatever I desired. The earth had no hold over me. All that mattered was here, now, and my imagination. 

I felt like Nadja.  I wasn't bound to the concrete logical things of the earth; my mind was residing in a surreal other universe: my imagination.

We were riding a magic carpet, being rescued my princes, and fighting dragons. For the first time in years she and I were able to just let go and be kids again. Be sisters again. We grabbed our hotel sheets and pretended they were gowns. As she smeared red lipstick on her lips and as I made a tiara out of paper, we looked at each other. In her eyes there was wonder and magic and the belief that anything was possible. For the first time in years she had freed herself and gave away to her dreams. She let herself believe that she was a princess. Together, we broke down the w-a-l-l that had separated us for years: adulthood. As we let go of our inhibitions and fears we became children who believed again. 

It was like riding a magic carpet.

The way her eyes gleamed. The way my heart felt. As we spread out our arms in regal flight, we floated and drifted away into Wonderland as sisters again.


It was magical.





Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Toto...We're In Miami

We climbed down the trees, resigning to the fact the heaven couldn't be reached via branches.
"Let's go on a crazy adventure!" Great, here we go again with the talk. She constantly nagged me that we needed to see the world before we started our lives. "It will be a last hoorah before we inevitably go our s-e-p-a-r-a-t-e ways." She got me. Every time. I hated the talk of us being apart. The sadness of her lies is what made me give in...we were going.
Light. Good Lord light everywhere. It had paralyzed my vision and overtaken all of my senses. I couldn't move, think, or breathe. As my eyes adjusted and sweat began rollinggg off me like rain, I said to her (in the best imitating voice I could manage):
We...were in...Miami. If Georgia was heaven, did that make this h e l l? It felt like a sinfully sweet paradise.  
We stopped at a little Cuban Cafe to get some cafecito con tostado. We sipped our drinks. She was perusing pamphlets of local attractions as I soaked up this place. 
Music filled the air with a sort of rich history that made "the young and the old swing their hips and mouth the words." Miami had so many unexplored corners that seemed to be inviting, yet strange...
Suddenly my sense of belonging was questioned. The awareness that this place was not home, yet it felt so warmly different and inviting was unnerving for me. She liked it. She practically threw herself into it; I tried. One bite couldn't hurt...right?

Miami...what a sinfully delicious paradise indeed.